Cherishing Memories: Things I Wish I Had Asked My Grandma Before She Passed

Our grandparents hold a treasure trove of wisdom and experiences, yet all too often, we don't take the time to ask them about their lives, their stories, and the lessons they've learned along the way. It's only when they're no longer with us that we realize how much we missed out on. This post, is a reflection on the things I wish I had asked my grandmothers before they passed away. It's a reminder to cherish the moments we have with our loved ones and to make the most of the time we have left with those who mean the most to us.

1. Her Childhood Memories:

One thing I regret not asking my grandmothers more about is their childhoods. I remember my grandma telling me stories of her childhood as bedtime stories. Of the family getting their first car. It was a four seater but they crammed six or seven in it, then the older kids would ride on the outside standing on the runningboards and hooking their arms in through the windows. I remember her telling me about the stubborn horse she would ride and how it stopped short at every puddle - even at a full gallop. She couldn’t count the number of times she was thrown over the horses head and straight into said puddle.

But I grew out of stories at bedtime and so the stories stopped. I wish I had asked about her favorite games, her best friends, and her fondest memories from those early years?

She was the first generation born in the US. How was it to grow up in an immigrant household? Hearing her stories would have painted a vivid picture of her younger self and the world she grew up in, allowing me to better understand the person she became.

2. Family History and Ancestry:

Our grandparents often hold a wealth of knowledge about our family's history and ancestry. I am fortunate that my grandma was active in family history. Ava isn’t as lucky. He father’s side of the family is hard to trace and no one in the family really has any information further than her grandma and grandpa. wish I had asked her grandparents about their family tree, their ancestors, and any significant family traditions or stories they could have shared.

3. Life During Significant Historical Events:

My grandmas both lived through several significant historical events. One, was born in 1900 and witnessed the suffrage movement as a teenager. When she became old enough to vote, women had only held the right to do so for a year. Did she participate? Was their local barriers to participate? How did the men in her life feel about the change? Both my grandmothers worked in the war effort during World War II. One was a cook for the men on the docks, and one was a riviter (a regular Rosie). What was that like? How do they remember the Civil Rights Movement? Did they participate? How did it present it self in their towns? My grandma witnessed both the transition from horse to automobile and the moon landing. I wish I had asked her about her experiences during those times, her thoughts on the world-changing events she witnessed, and how they shaped her perspective on life.

4. Her Life's Greatest Achievements:

Each person's life is a tapestry of achievements, big and small. I wish I had taken the time to ask my grandma about the proudest moments in her life, the goals she achieved, and the dreams she pursued. Her accomplishments would have served as a source of inspiration for me and future generations. Even as I dig through my mother’s old papers I am learning of achievements in her childhood I never knew about. She won a home economics contest sponsored by Betty Crocker when she was in highschool. She made the newspaper and kept the clipping. It was a state wide contest. I wonder what she did to win and what the prize was. It was hardly her greatest accomplishment, but still a fun fact. I know even less about my grandmothers.

5. Personal Values and Life Lessons:

Grandparents often impart invaluable life lessons and wisdom. I regret not asking my grandma about her core values, the principles that guided her decisions, and the advice she had for navigating life's challenges. Both endured heartbreak, hard times and uncertainty. their insights could have been a guiding light in my own journey.

6. Her Favorite Recipes and Traditions:

Food and family traditions are an essential part of any culture. I wish I had asked my grandma about her favorite recipes, the special dishes she prepared for holidays, and the traditions she held dear. My mom’s mom was a big part of my childhood and I remember a lot about her traditions. I remember her cookies, so many types, that she made for the holidays. My favorites were the krokaner, hallongrottor, schackrutor, and the scandinavian rosettes, but all of them were yummy and I have the recipes for them. I even have her bread recipe (it has bacon fat in it!) But there are so many dishes that she made that I never learned to make, and so many traditions that were lost - as happens when younger generations get married and blend their traditions for their own families.

These recipes and traditions are not only a link to our heritage but also a way to keep thier memories alive.

7. Her Hopes and Dreams for Future Generations:

Lastly, I wish I had asked my grandmothers about their hopes and dreams for their children, grandchildren, and beyond.

As we reflect on the things, we wish we had asked our grandparents before they passed, let's also remember the importance of cherishing the time we have with our loved ones today. Their stories, wisdom, and love are invaluable gifts that enrich our lives. Let this be a reminder to engage in meaningful conversations with our grandparents, children and grandchildren while we still have the opportunity, ensuring that their stories and wisdom are passed down through the generations.